Dear NBA Fans:Shawn Drotar

Posted on May 21st, 2009 in Gaming, Opinion by Shawn Drotar

We’re sorry we’re in the Mountain Time Zone, which many of you don’t realize exists.

We’re sorry we live at altitudes between 6,000 and 13,000 feet, and many people assume only Sherpas can survive there. Yes, it’s hard to breathe sometimes, but you get used to it.

We’re sorry our road uniforms look like pajamas.

We also think it’s weird that our power forward looks like he got kissed by Angelina Jolie after a Botox treatment.

We’re aware that our backup power forward is completely insane.

We’re actually rather grateful that Spike Lee doesn’t feel compelled to cinematically fellate one of our players on ESPN with a “documentary”.

We’re sorry that none of our players does anything stylish like covering the press table with chalk or walk around with a kids’ Superman Halloween costume on.

We’re aware the local twelve may not become the NBA champions, but if it’s all the same to you, would you mind please considering our humble basketball team as contenders at this point? Finally? Thanks.

One Response to 'Dear NBA Fans:'

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  1. dascenzo said,

    on May 22nd, 2009 at 7:14 am

    I miss Chauncey, the what if scenarios off a healthy Billups in last year’s conference finals and no AI this year… By the way you never become contenders without a superstar, even after winning a championship.

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